11:55 What if What if WHAT IF

So its like 11:55 and I am just starting on my latest post I am feeling so sick because I am like freaking out over tomorrow what if my uncle doesn't come what if  I forget my asthma pump what if one of my cousins falls of the  wharf and I am the only there with hem or her.
GRRR WHAT IF WHAT IF WHAT IFS  it hurts my brain why can't I stop worrying my mum said to me once in a fight. "Maybe if you stop worrying about the problems of others you can fix your own"
This statement has stuck to me like glue forever.
Anyways a couple of weeks ago my great-grandmother I felt so much like crying but I couldn't and then I was listening to this you tube song getting ready for school and I just bursted  into tears uncontrollable I don't know what happened but here's the song. 

Why is my name emo by force?

If you were wondering my blog name (emo by force) is what it is because I feel as if  I didn't want to emo and I didn't what to cut myself and hide from the true but I do because of years of fighting with my parents and my parents fighting each other I have learnt one thing if no harm can come from what people don't know.
My name is emo by force because if I hadn't see my parents fighting over dumb things like my mum losing one of her rings and then having it turned into my mum being dumb I don't think I would have ever turned out like this and that's just what I believe if you don't think I am right feel free to comment in the box below. 

This is my first post so you can get to know me.

So first thing I should is hi and well welcome to my blog here are some things you should know about me.

-I am depressed

-I am a girl

-I am tall

-I love cheetahs

-I live with my dad

-I cut myself

-I have a skin thing called eczema (it makes my skin itchy)

-I have asthma 

-I have glasses but don't wear them

-I hate my mum
-My best friend is sort of cheating on me with my enemy  
-I am pretty skinny (friends have told me)
-I don't eat until I am like dyeing of starvation 
-My dad always buys me food he owns I will eat because he knows I don't food to school 
-I don't eat the food he gives me

& that's really it I have started this blog to help others that are depressed to should them what I have become I can't remember when I first realized I might be depressed but I know it was a very long time ago.